I Played the Blame Game

Many years ago I blamed my parents’ for not paving the path for me to do great things.  Or the mere fact I had to work harder than the next person to live a comfortable life because the foundation for success was unspoken of in my home.  Blaming others for where we are in life does not change our current position. We are where we are, until we make a choice to be in a better place.  Undoubtedly, I needed someone to take the blame to justify what I considered to be my failure.  My maladaptive behaviors were a result of my cognitive distortions which had me believing, I am less than. I was hurting while I tried to figure out life, as I desperately wanted to know how could I possibly make it out of high school as a teen mom, or go to college, etc.? A long time ago, I decided not to let my past define who I am.  Although my past plays a significant role in my life, I am not my past. I decided to make a choice in my life to accept where I am and accept what is. Once I recognized the “what is” of my life, I grew mentally and emotionally.  I learned the power of self-love and created my own path to success.Quote on starting over
Today is a great day to accept the “what is.”  What keeps you from accepting your “what is?”  Stay encouraged!
Tren B.

25 Comments

  1. Lauren

    October 3, 2018 at 1:34 PM

    What a great post! I play the blame game all the time as well. Definitely something I am working on!
    Lauren | https://livebythesunshine.com

  2. Natalie

    October 3, 2018 at 4:28 PM

    Fellow teen mom here as well…all we can do is pick ourselves up and see the role we played in it. Good for you girl!

    1. Trenye B.

      October 9, 2018 at 10:52 AM

      Absolutely! We tend to learn from our past mishaps.

  3. thefrugalmommyblog

    October 3, 2018 at 5:22 PM

    I used to play the blame game too! And then I realized it was on me, regardless where I came from!

    1. Trenye B.

      October 9, 2018 at 10:53 AM

      So true! At some point, we need to look in the mirror. Thanks for visiting my page.

  4. healthywithjamie

    October 3, 2018 at 5:56 PM

    Thank you for sharing!

  5. OLAYINKA

    October 3, 2018 at 10:21 PM

    I used to blame other so much! I’m working on learn to be accountable and take responsibility for what i want to work in my life!

    1. Trenye B.

      October 9, 2018 at 10:56 AM

      That’s a great start! A step at a time, that’s where I am.

  6. Delux Designs (DE), LLC

    October 4, 2018 at 5:24 PM

    Great post, can definitely relate to feeling lost and not knowing what to do next with life. Thanks for opening up!

  7. Nicole Watts

    October 4, 2018 at 7:27 PM

    It takes a lot to get over cognitive behavior patterns of self doubt. Just know you are not alone in your journey – I am proud of you for sharing!

    1. Trenye B.

      October 9, 2018 at 10:59 AM

      Thank you for visiting. The cognitive patterns will always be there (I’m human). But I make a strong effort to focus on the here and now; and my many blessings.

  8. MrBlack

    October 5, 2018 at 12:08 AM

    Growth from any situation is success! An adaptive mind is a mind equipped with the necessities of survival in tough situations. Coupled with resiliency, (which you obviously have) no goal is unachievable!

  9. Rhonda

    October 5, 2018 at 10:58 AM

    This is a much needed reminder. I find myself often wanting to blame my upbringing for why I never exposed myself to certain things, but I’m learning that I am not bound by that. Thanks for sharing and being so honest.

    1. Trenye B.

      October 9, 2018 at 11:01 AM

      Yes, girl! I am with you on “I am not bound by that.” Thanks for your support!

  10. Jen @ Jenron Designs

    October 5, 2018 at 11:16 AM

    Great attitudes and very positive post, sometime we can pick the hand we are delt we just have to do our best with what we a given. Just keep moving in the right direction and you all get where you want to go.

    1. Trenye B.

      October 9, 2018 at 11:02 AM

      Thank you for the kind words! I’m taking baby steps in the right direction.

  11. Just Motherhood (@Just_motherhood)

    October 5, 2018 at 2:10 PM

    I love this such a great post always important to take responsibility and to not blame anyone as we all have our own choices. xx

    1. Trenye B.

      October 9, 2018 at 11:04 AM

      Yes, at some point we have our own choices. I realized that although I was not provided the ideal childhood, I learned to make better choices to prevent the “generation curse.”

  12. Sarah

    October 5, 2018 at 5:50 PM

    This is such a great reminder that we are all responsible for our own choices going forward, no matter what our past might look like. It’s so easy to get caught in that blame game.

    1. Trenye B.

      October 9, 2018 at 11:05 AM

      It sure it. I can attest to that! But I’m here and ready to live a healthy and purposeful life. Thanks for visiting.

  13. Joann

    October 9, 2018 at 10:41 AM

    Thank you for sharing, I’ve played the blame game letting past circumstances shape my behaviors but with the Lords salvation I was able to see how my behavior affected myself and others, changing my attitude about life opened doors I didn’t know existed and now see taking responsibility makes me powerful!

  14. Trenye B.

    October 9, 2018 at 11:11 AM

    So true. Because of His grace and mercy, I am free of my past. I am so thankful for that. Thanks for sharing.

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