No Family or Friends, Just Us!

No family or friends, just us! In the past, my family and I would do what typical families do during the Thanksgiving holiday, visit family and friends, eat a massive amount of food, Black Friday shop, etc.  My husband is from Kentucky and I am from Florida.  We would typically alternate between the two for different holidays/occasions, as typical military families do.  As time progressed, Chief and I decided to create our very own nouveau Thanksgiving tradition.  No family or friends, just us! For the past few years, we planned and saved to travel during the Thanksgiving holiday.  Here are a few pictures from the past two years.  We visited Gatlinburg, TN. and Keystone, CO.
 


But this year was different.  Chief nor family are in the area.  We had the seemingly, mandated choice of going back to my hometown or staying local and creating, once again a not so luxurious and nouveau tradition.  I miss my family and friends back at home.  But I think I have learned to adjust to life without them in the area.  Chief and I discussed my plans, then we discussed it with our girls’.  I made the choice to create a new tradition.  Our military life has been far from what we call traditional.  We stayed local during the holiday.  No family or friends, just us! Just my girls’ and I, we cooked, danced, laughed and had a good time admiring one another.
 

At first (a few days), I felt a sense of guilt because I felt the “need” to check-in with family. Or (the thought of) the girls’ are growing so fast and they “need” to see so and so.  But once I sat and pondered on me addressing everyone else’s needs, I had to think and reevaluate my needs.  I needed this downtime to be free…  Free from the hustle and bustle, free from road trips, free from entertaining others, free from luggage, free from it all!  I needed the time to reevaluate and focus on my needs.
Although, the twins had dance and soccer practice during our time away from school.  Most parents can relate, when children are involved, there is no such thing as idle time.  But we were thankful for the slow pace this holiday brought us.  Read my blogs where I discuss Resilience in Military spouses and Resilience in Military Spouses..Part 2.
What did you do for Thanksgiving? Did you travel? Host dinner?  Leave a comment.  But of course, like and share.
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50 Comments

  1. Patricia-Ann Que

    November 28, 2018 at 11:00 AM

    thanksgiving in Canada is a lot earlier and it is not normally I practice since I grew up in asia. but I like this tradition as it brings everyone closer including friends and love ones!

    1. Trenye B.

      December 1, 2018 at 6:14 PM

      I agree. I enjoy seeing my family and friends.

  2. Christina

    November 28, 2018 at 4:26 PM

    Hi ,
    It sounds as though you had a very enjoyable and relaxing Thanksgiving! 🙂 Sometimes, with our over packed stressful schedules, you need a calm, fun time in a relaxed way. There is social media, Facetime, Skype, email, phone… to keep up with family around the world to connect more frequently than holidays! 🙂
    Best,
    Christina

    1. Trenye B.

      December 1, 2018 at 6:14 PM

      I am thankful for technology. Being a military family, it definitely keeps us in the loop with family and friends.

  3. incalexandra

    November 28, 2018 at 9:48 PM

    This sounds like a lovely and relaxing time for you all! We don’t celebrate Thanksgiving here in Australia. I love the idea of just staying home and spending time with my dearest.

  4. everydaywithmadirae

    November 28, 2018 at 10:07 PM

    I love that you just enjoyed that time with your girls! I’m living in Canada for the winter while my fiancé plays basketball here, so unfortunately we aren’t close to family or friends either. And Canada already celebrated their Thanksgiving so it kinda felt a little off lol! But I made a small dinner for the two of us & made a pumpkin pie, & it was just fine!
    -Madi xo
    http://www.everydaywithmadirae.com

    1. Trenye B.

      December 1, 2018 at 6:16 PM

      Sometimes, smaller is better. Thankful for the small things in life. Thanks for visiting.

    2. Trenye B.

      December 1, 2018 at 6:41 PM

      I am sure you miss your family and friends. We just learn to make the best of it. And learn to enjoy the small dinners, small groups, etc.

  5. michelleonyourside

    November 28, 2018 at 11:08 PM

    I think we have to break free of expectations and do what makes us happy.

  6. Kristie Cirak

    November 29, 2018 at 6:19 AM

    We dont have thanksgiving here but I can tell you a relaxed christmas is great for us, especially with kids. We enjoy that rather than a crazy day!

    1. Trenye B.

      December 1, 2018 at 6:17 PM

      Ha! I can relate. Hoping you get a relaxed Christmas this year.

  7. Amber

    November 29, 2018 at 7:14 AM

    I think that’s great! My husband is in the military so for many years we just had Thanksgiving as a family. Now we live closer to my parents, so we do celebrate with them.

    1. Trenye B.

      December 1, 2018 at 6:18 PM

      That’s awesome! It’s always pleasant to spend time with family.

  8. heidifowler

    November 29, 2018 at 8:33 AM

    It looks like you did a great job making the holiday special for your girls. Hopefully everyone will be back together again next year. It’s nice to have a small holiday sometimes, but I’m sure you especially missed Chief. I hope he won’t miss many more holidays. Beautiful girls.

  9. Dalene Ekirapa

    November 29, 2018 at 8:42 AM

    I think that sometimes you just have to celebrate together as ‘JUST YOU’ . We tried that last year Christmas and although it was a good new experience, I did miss the rest of the family.

    1. Trenye B.

      December 1, 2018 at 6:20 PM

      I like that, celerbrate “just you.” That is so true.

  10. OurGranny Admin

    November 29, 2018 at 9:51 AM

    This is so heartwarming and you and the girls look so happy. Nothing wrong with celebrating amongst us. Our families are across oceans and we do the same and build our own family traditions!

    1. Trenye B.

      December 1, 2018 at 6:25 PM

      Over the years, I think we have learned to adjust to our small family

  11. Tatianna Gabrielle Alvarez

    November 29, 2018 at 11:44 AM

    such a sweet post! we did a small thanksgiving too! just me and my immediate family! it was perfect

    1. Trenye B.

      December 1, 2018 at 6:26 PM

      Thank you. Thankful for the small things!

  12. Tara Pittman (@momknowsbest15)

    November 29, 2018 at 12:04 PM

    I like traveling for the holidays but now that my kids are all in town, I am staying put. I so enjoy having them all over for dinner.

    1. Trenye B.

      December 1, 2018 at 6:26 PM

      I am sure that was a lot of fun!

  13. Sarah Bailey

    November 29, 2018 at 12:54 PM

    It sounds like you did a wonderful job of making the holidays a special time for you all. We don’t celebrate Thanksgiving here so it’s always interesting to hear what others do.

    1. Trenye B.

      December 1, 2018 at 6:28 PM

      Thank you. I think the only reason we actually started our own tradition, is because we moved away from family and friends.

  14. learningtobefreebriana

    November 29, 2018 at 5:44 PM

    I think this is a great start to a new tradition with your family. As long as you are together and happy, it’s a wonderful holiday.

    1. Trenye B.

      December 1, 2018 at 6:29 PM

      Absolutely! Thanks for visiting.

  15. Wedding Invitation Blogger

    November 29, 2018 at 6:38 PM

    Thank you for sharing this information. 🙂

  16. Keshia Richmond

    November 29, 2018 at 7:16 PM

    I love these type of holidays where you can create your own holiday traditions.

  17. kaypittmanknits

    November 29, 2018 at 7:47 PM

    This sounds like a great idea and I love Gatlinberg. We usually head there during the summer but I bet it’s really nice in the fall

    1. Trenye B.

      December 1, 2018 at 6:31 PM

      We visited once during the summer of 05. But ever since, we have gone in the fall or winter. It is extremly beautiful during the fall. Too cold for me in the winter/snowy months, lol.

  18. Laura Turru

    November 30, 2018 at 7:36 AM

    I’m thinking about doing this for Christmas. My family and my husband’s family are local and close to each other but there’s just times that all you want to be with is your kids and spouse. I’ve made up my mind and I’ll be having a relaxing Christmas with my family of 5

    1. Trenye B.

      December 1, 2018 at 6:32 PM

      Sometimes, our body (mind) needs that. I hope you enjoy your much needed quality time with your family this Christmas.

  19. Jessica Lynn Martin

    November 30, 2018 at 9:58 AM

    We live in Kentucky so I know exactly where Kentucky is. We traveled to the other side of Kentucky to see my husband’s family. We usually spend it with my husband’s side of the family. It looks like you all had a great time with it just being you all for Thanksgiving. We have done holidays with it just being my husband, myself, and our little ones and not traveling. I think it is perfectly okay to do that once in a while. Sometimes you just need that time as a family. 🙂

    1. Trenye B.

      December 1, 2018 at 6:34 PM

      How ironic? Chief’s family is all over KY.

  20. Hadassah

    November 30, 2018 at 10:37 AM

    There’s nothing wrong with putting yourself first. The holidays can give someone major anxiety and i do t blame you! As long as you and you’re family are happy that’s all that matters

  21. Linda Kinsman

    November 30, 2018 at 11:48 AM

    I think a slow paced Thanksgiving was just what you all needed. I’m glad you let go of any guilt you felt for not traveling to extended family etc and found a new tradition with your girls.

    1. Trenye B.

      December 1, 2018 at 6:36 PM

      I am hoping not to have too many more Thanksgiving’s without Chief. Thanks for visiting.

  22. kaypittmanknits

    November 30, 2018 at 10:25 PM

    I love this! Sometimes it’s nice just being with your spouse and kids. I’ve considered doing this numerous times during the holiday

    1. Trenye B.

      December 1, 2018 at 6:37 PM

      Sometimes we have to pay attention to what our body needs. Thanks for visiting.

  23. Vjay Rao

    December 1, 2018 at 12:57 AM

    I think it is a super idea to give some time to yourself. Travel adds to the experience and you also get to see new places.

  24. ADEXE Watch (@ADEXE_Watch)

    December 1, 2018 at 2:34 PM

    That’s the same for my family and I, but on Christmas. We don’ have thanksgiving in Europe. But yeah, it is just us and it is amazing every single year!

    1. Trenye B.

      December 1, 2018 at 6:38 PM

      That’s great to hear! Just time to enjoy each other.

  25. Sandra

    December 2, 2018 at 8:32 AM

    We actually do not celebrate thanksgiving way back … but the influence coming from the annual thanksgiving abroad led most of the families around us to actually celebrate it and even have their own version of “turkey” being replaced sometimes with a whole chicken. It’s like an inspired version of Thanksgiving… I love having the time just to be with my family amidst the chaos of everyday life – just a moment away from the work, work, and more work… and yes, downtime is essential… rest and recovery is key to a better state of mind.

  26. bridget

    December 2, 2018 at 1:04 PM

    I’m such a fan of creating your own holiday traditions. This year my boyfriend and I went to the Parade and came home and made a huge breakfast. We were so stuffed we ended up saving dinner for the next day. Two Thanksgivings in one haha

  27. Riana.AngCanning

    December 2, 2018 at 1:26 PM

    I love this! Good for you for carving out that time for you and your girls, and you and your partner before that. The holidays always seem so stressful and you’re right – is it about other people’s needs. Good for you for putting your needs first!
    https://teaspoonofadventure.com

  28. Alyona

    December 2, 2018 at 1:28 PM

    Sometimes we need a change… our Thanksgiving this year was different too. Losing my parents in law couple month before this Holliday made it so difficult to enjoy it. But we still tried to honor them by saying funny stories about them and how they met.
    And yes, I did host the dinner and it was too much food;)))

  29. knockingonfortysdoor

    December 2, 2018 at 6:29 PM

    I couldn’t agree more! Some of my favorite holidays growing up were when we were overseas and it was just my immediate family. I also have preferred those as an adult with my own children now! It really allows the focus to be on what is meaningful to your family.

  30. crisinthebigd

    December 2, 2018 at 7:58 PM

    Normally is only me and hubby on Thanksgiving, since my family live in Brazil. We still cook a nice meal and there is the past 2 years we went to a football game. But this year was different, we actually spent the whole weekend with my husband family and it was awesome!!!

  31. Ashley

    January 11, 2019 at 11:05 AM

    Looks like a Thanksgiving your family will never forget!

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